idham

2007-08-12T01:07:00.000+08:00

..........

my blog's dead. lol.

and now i'm becoming desperate trying to think of what to type in my attempt to revive this mundane blog. lol.

ok let's see...jc has never been more stressful and pressurising than it could ever get.

teachers are all saying that i need to score a b for every subject for my mid-course to get promoted...do u know how that feels? yeah the pressure man...and i still can't find time to complete my homework...let alone study...or practise my guitar techniques.

hmm. anyways, happy belated birthday singapore! went to the padang to form the biggest human national flag...lol, interesting experience. got to see the panaromic view of singapore with the city skyline, supreme court building, whatever. and also got to hang out and chill to the sights of fireworks and old school rock music and cigarettes. if only life could be like this...

sometimes, words have two meanings...(stairway to heaven).

if only i can find my stairway to heaven. hur hur.

2007-07-13T23:40:00.000+08:00

i did great for my summer test. i'm being sarcastic, mind you. lol.

but anyway, there's still some things in life i look forward to. *points to the pictures*

yeah, my birthday presents from someone special. :D

2007-07-09T23:53:00.000+08:00

it seems that over time, friends tend to forget one another. yeah, it seems my friends are forgetting me.

i used to have quite a number of msn friends, friends whom i will chat with everyday, and yeah, i know it's just chat friends, but i believed that there was sth going on there, like a friendship being forged, and i did meet some of them and hang out with them...but now, it seems that after quite some time, they wont bother chatting with me anymore. it's not like people will start talking to me in msn for that matter.

so, yeah...it sucks. to know that you are not wanted. i mean, why bother then right? yeah, why should i always bother? maybe it's, why are you always bothering people, idham?

ok, so from now onwards, i won't bother about these kinda things anymore.
maybe i won't even sign in to msn beginning from today. but that's just a maybe, because the msn is where i get to chat with people and i know myself better than anyone else, which is that i usually don't keep my word.

i mean, i just don't get it, i could have easily lived my life in isolation. but i chose not to.

it just seems that i've always had only myself all this while.

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

2007-07-08T23:15:00.000+08:00

ok live earth is over, i miss the metallica performance. shit.

haha, school tmr. woo!

great, just what i need...

going to school is really depressing.

2007-07-07T23:15:00.000+08:00

woo! am watching live earth now...not too bad, not too bad.

i mean like it's a nice concert, some nice performances...although there were some which i have never heard nor seen the artists before...but still it was nice. and i think the whole concept of it is rather new, unique, a music marathon of 24 hours in seven continents to help save the earth? yeah, it's good, music is indeed influential. and it's global, cool eh?

but still, there's an irony to it. you see, the music that the artists sang were not really associated with saving the earth...and usually by having concerts, people will gather and create more litter when the concert is finished. that's what i think, but it may not be true.

and i just thought that maybe there's a better way of going about in spreading the message of saving the earth and to create the awareness of global warming. i think that having a concert might run from the focus of saving the earth, and some people will just listen to the music and forget the main cause of the concert in the first place. haha...and today, two incidents really made me see just how ppl still do not really care about saving the earth.

while i was walking home from meeting my friend, i saw two kids, probably 6 year olds, littering. they dropped their macdonald cokes on the floor on purpose and also littered like tissue papaer and food. only 6 year olds? hmm...

and then at sim lim square, while accompanying my brother to buy his mp3, people were giving out papers advertising the things they were selling...and they even forced me to take the papers. i didnt want to accept the papers they were giving out initially as besides having no meaning to me, as in i couldn't care less about the items they were selling, i also didn't like the sight of people wasting paper. and they just shoved them into my hands. what else can i do? so i just took them, and pondered upon the live earth concert that was going to take place today, and in contrast, these bunch of ignorant people who only think about making money and not on the damage they have done to earth and how stupid they are in not realising that a teenager like me is not interested in computer or computer parts.

haha, oh well, the live earth concert was still nice. the guitarist for rihanna was wicked. and so was the guy from motherwolf.

i just hope to see change in people, why are people so ignorant of the environment and the earth? lol, i'm not crazy ok, but i learnt that if you don't take care of the environment, you would destroy yourself. the earth is all we got.

2007-07-07T00:01:00.000+08:00

17 years ago from today was a dreadful day.

ok i was a little too late, no, not 7th, 6th of July.

Thanks to all those who wished me. =)

the end. the first week of school i mean. yeah, horrible.
i failed my two h1s. gp and maths.
i got shouted at by a teacher for my hair, and it got cut, again, for nth. KNNCCB. waste my 5 dollars, think i print money issit?
the weather's been terrible.
i need to depend on my three h2s now.
pegasus next year? 0843A?
nah, don't think so,
it's not that i'm saying i will pass,
i mean i'm going to poly if i get retained.

and i hate it when a teacher shouts at you when all you do is ask for his reasons when you think he is being unreasonable or is acting like a complete ass. it's not about authority, it's respect, mutual respect as individuals. FUCK. screw him sia.

2007-07-04T01:16:00.000+08:00

BACK TO SCHOOL

oh i'm so happy to be back at school. i miss school so dearly!

ah fuck it. end of day one. it was okay, i guess? but could be better....haha.

it's only day one. i still have 23123532546576879806452 days to go before i get all the freedom i want.

all i know is that it will never come.

and i know that...

all of this world is just an illusion.

2007-07-01T15:17:00.000+08:00

hey

school begins on tuesday.
i can't wait. hur hur.
i don't enjoy going to school anymore.
jc's so boring.
school is all about studies, discipline, cca.
the teachers always go after your hair, homework, and latecoming
they go after pretty girls with short skirts
and yet i still see lots of sexy thighs
not complaining though,
as without it, i might hate school more
and you do need the sex
anyway, the moment school's over for the day
i scream in joy
but on the inside.
yet i know my joy is to be shortlived.
as i have homework,
and i have school again tmr.

random.

2007-06-30T12:57:00.000+08:00

ok, so

summer test is over
i think it's difficult
more difficult than o lvls
i've never studied so much before
having holidays for 5 days
i need a longer holiday
i have school beginning from next week
i cut my hair
i miss my secondary school
i miss my secondary school friends
i feel awkward at jc without my friends around
i think im going to poly next year if i fail
but i hope things go well
am awaiting for better days

2007-06-29T00:19:00.000+08:00

i've been doing some thinking and i just thought that i should post up this entry.

ok, if u owe someone, u would definitely try to pay back right?

that's what i would do,

i would try to pay the person back asap, even if it means going without lunch for one week

i would pay installments and not wait for years...just to pay him, i would at least pay him a certain amount first even if i dont have the money

i would not try to run away from the fact that i owe the person...like as in when the person asks me about the money, i would discuss with him/her how to go about doing it. and not just ignore and look at him blankly or joke about it...

or just give excuses like next month...or my next pay, my next pay...

and worst of all, the next month, that person buys a psp, or fixes his psp without paying you first

and when you keep bugging him for the money, he gets irritated, he confronts you on msn asking you why you are acting this way and even to the extent of willing to let it affect the friendship.

the thing is, dont talk to me about friendship when you yourself dont fulfill your responsibilty as a friend of paying what you owe me. i mean like you took two years.

and the thing i hate most is when ppl dont admit what they do. they dont admit spoiling ppl's stuffs. here's the thing, my discman is spoilt because the cover broke...this exposes the laser reading the cds to light, dusts which then spoils it

and i dont lie ok...
and i think it's lame for you to say you only promised to pay for the cover? like, what????

ok so those are the things that i've been keeping inside of me that i think i should just post up here and hope that someone reads and understands how i'm feeling.

ok fine, maybe u've paid 50, but after two years? and where's the rest? u promised next month and next month and still nth.

the way i see it, even if the friendship is affected, i dont care as if you are a friend, i would not have to wait for two years in the first place and i still am waiting.

i've been keeping this inside of me for too long, why do i always have to be the one that has to compromise and keep my discontent inside of me? i have the right to say what i feel too.

and the thing is, this is my blog. if you hate to see what i post, then...too bad.

yeah, so that's all i guess.

2007-06-25T22:59:00.001+08:00

WAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HISTORY SUCKS MAN. I DIDNT REALLY KNOW HOW TO ANSWER THE QUESTIONS. AH FUCK IT.

3 MORE PAPERS TO GO.

TMR IS ECONS.

I THINK I'M NOT SLEEPING TONIGHT.

RANDOM TARDYNESS

2007-06-25T00:52:00.000+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

hello. haha...yes the end of the holidays is bringing misery to me...time flies so fast that i just realised that i have summer test, starting with history tmr. and i have not studied. please just kill me or sth. i'm in really deep shit this time.

i wasted my time. just like that. fuck.

and i remembered how scared i was for o lvls. well, that was nth. maybe this is nth also. at least not yet.

what the hell was i thinking going into jc?

2007-06-12T01:44:00.000+08:00

lol...ok, so i sound emo in my blog entries eh?

nvr really thought about it...but hey, i typed what i feel k.

and yeah maybe i am emo, as in emotional...at least i dont type entries like telling ppl how many times i masturbated that day, how many times i farted or what porn websites i visited. lol.

i don't mean it literally k. i mean at least i dont just say what i did? and i'm not writing this for ppl's reading pleasure...(really?) lol...well at least i try not to, i just try to make it somewhat not too boring? you get what i mean...you wouldn't want to make a fool of yourself in front of i-don't-know-how-many?-millions-of-people?-who-might-just-come-across-ur-blog? right?

hmm...anyways, tmr having sentosa outing with secondary school class. looking forward to it? can't really say.

but anyways, i do really miss being a secondary school student.

this sucks.

2007-06-08T02:17:00.000+08:00

hey...

yeah it's late at night...it's 2:15 am.

and i like the feeling...the feeling of being alone and listening to songs and trying to study. yeah, trying to...lol. well, i keep getting distracted by some things and listening to certain songs just makes me feel worse.

i really miss playing the guitar and performing...that's one of the ways i escape from reality (besides smoking) - yes i'm always in denial about my life.

performing or simply playing the guitar makes me forget about my problems...it makes me feel great about myself.

too bad that wont happen anymore.

so now what? studying only makes me bored to death.

life sucks, really. all i need is someone. that someone to make me feel glad about my life. i've lost you. and i lost myself along the way. i'm sorry. this sucks.

2007-06-06T15:18:00.000+08:00

hey...yes i've not been updating...cos really, there's nth for me to update about.

life's been boring. school too. i think i'm still in the slacking mood i was in after o levels. or maybe that i don't have fun friends anymore. well, jc friends, they are nice people...but secondary school friends...well, no one can compare to them. but not all are great...you can really tell who will be by your side and i've been having a fallout with some of them.

gotta mug for summer test soon...i'm in a dilemma...i feel like failing on purpose as i really cant take jc...it's boring...but then again, one year and the amount of money i've spent...not to mention, my parents' faith in me.

let's just see what happens.

2007-05-29T00:18:00.000+08:00

i suddenly feel kinda down all of a sudden...

it's ironic, i've been around friends and good company all this while...but i just feel...so lonely.

maybe, i'm not good enough...

i was never good in anything anyway.

2007-05-17T23:51:00.000+08:00

school turned out surprisingly good today. econs lecture was okay, there wasn't any PE and instead we watched a movie and also, hist test wasn't that bad.

i hope it's the same for tmr...
i'm having gp test tmr. wish me luck ppl, even if u dont want to.

2007-05-13T00:37:00.000+08:00

wow. i'm amazed by how some people call themselves friends. maybe they didn't even regard me as a friend.

so it's all about sounding like one huh? how can we even sound like one if we are not one? you guys keep going about doing your own things. so i'm not good and i'm not musically talented? so you guys, having musical backgrounds better than me? hah, don't think so. if you guys are, why not play lead? too good? HAH

don't ask me why i'm being this way. ask yourselves what you did. and don't bother talking to me about performing the next time. or simply, don't talk to me at all.

the ironic thing is, you guys are performing without me and you tell me? ironic huh? you expect me to feel all great about that? and don't say that you guys are performing without me cos i'm busy. you guys didn't even say a word to me.

champions of d gig huh?

more like losers to me.

even i have not discovered the deepest depths and ironies of myself.

2007-04-29T00:12:00.000+08:00

I look to the mirror and see someone staring back at me. who was that someone?

hey ppl.

sometimes, when i look at myself in the mirror and see my own reflection, i find myself staring at someone i have yet to know. the irony.

and how i really just hate the guy i see looking back at me sometimes.

yes i've been in denial but really, it makes me sick to be who i am and even more sick when i realise that i do not understand myself sometimes.

have you guys experienced it before? you look at yourself in the mirror yet wonder who you are? who or what that's looking back at you? what is it that's been doing all that talking, that laughing, that crying? what is it that's been causing you to act in a certain way or feel a certain way? what is it that laughs in front of others so that you can hide your true self, your pain, your sufferings but cries deep down inside? and isn't it ironic that every time you think you know who you are, you don't, cos beneath all that, the outer fraction of yourself, is the fragile side of you holding on to life ever so dearly.

who are you idham?

I'm so sick of him. of ME. of this.

2007-04-21T08:57:00.001+08:00

i look like some stupid ass. why? don't ask me. just look at me and laugh. but better not cos i am not gonna be too happy.

i seriously don't get it. i mean like why must JC people have this certain look? have that certain kind of hairstyle? have that certain kind of dressing? why can't we have long hair? does long hair mean u are low on moral values and discipline? i mean like why do they make it a school rule not to have long hair? i seriously don't get it. why is the world so stereotyped? and yes, you guessed it right. WOOO, u can call yourselves smart people now.

for the dumb people, i got caught for my hair and they cut it till i look like an ass.

yesterday was one of the worst moments in my life. why oh why?

2007-04-17T22:01:00.000+08:00

To the dismay of some of you out there, I'm still not dead yet, no not yet, but.. going to be. With that, i mean that i'm struggling in school. In fact i'm struggling with everything.

The smart people around me, the lousy subjects, the tiring P.E., the "very little" amount of homework...the fact that i must stand in MRT when i'm alr so tired sleeping for only three hours last night revising my work. WOW, jc is wonderful. everyone here has a life! tsk, yes i do realise that i'm insulting myself you asshole. hah, just kidding! seriously, i dont know what i'm doing in jc. so ironic of me to think that im going to be able to make it. only term 2 and i'm alr dragging myself on the floor.

yay, life is wonderful!

There you go amanda, my update.

2007-03-20T23:58:00.000+08:00

why the hell am i here again? well, i dont know, so dont ask me. i told myself i was gonna mug econs when i get back home but i really cant be bothered right now.

life really sucks.

me and mum have serious communication problems. well, actually, me and my parents, sometimes even friends. i just want them to be concern about me, not in shouting or screaming, but in actions that show they do care. even a smile or "how's school?" would do it.

i want, i want, i want...

acceptance.

2007-03-19T21:12:00.000+08:00

i just feel that life is so unfair.

anyway readers, before i start, let me warn you, i'm really gonna complain a lot so if you think that you will not be able to bear with the contents, i strongly advise that you leave.

ok, so what is it that is so unfair? well, everything. this whole stupid life of ours.

maybe it's just me, but i always get this vague disaffection, this constant feeling that i'm never too happy with my life. one ought, of course, to be thankful and rest content and hence, some of you might be wondering right now what the hell is wrong with me. well, cant you guys see what's wrong? come on, admit it that you guys sometimes feel that this whole life of ours is just some sort of perpetual cycle with lack of purpose and meaning in it. maybe you may not feel it that strongly but surely you must have felt that tinge of dissatisfaction about your own pathetic lives before. yes, you just saw me using the word pathetic and when i say pathetic, it's not merely to mock at you (well, maybe a little). i think all our lifes are pathetic, even mine. a life where we go about chasing papers, getting a good job, marrying with someone whom you might only know for a short while, setting up a family, having children, sending them to schools, growing old, retiring and then rotting on cpf and then what? waiting to die of course. isnt that pathetic people? what happen to your passion? what happen to love and finding the right one? what happen to spending time with family members?? what happen to just sitting down and looking back at how fortunate you are to be able to experience life in the first place? what happen to helping the less fortunate? life is short people and do you really want to waste your time going about carrying out the perpetual cycle just because everyone else is doing it? well, the answer is yes. the truth is, we have to. i'm not blaming you guys or anything but i just feel that to be trapped in this whole rubbish of life cycle really just pisses me off. i believe that it is unfair for our life to be decided by things like education and to go about chasing papers. that is not why we are down here on Earth. but oh well, since when is life unfair? it is because that it is never fair that we tend to appreciate it more when good things happen once in a while. that is why we have ups and downs in our lifes, however most of it being filled with downs of course.

but then again people, dont mind me. i'm just stressed up. and no i'm not stressed out about just school, i'm stressed out about money. while some of you gluttons get pocket money and are feeding off your parents, me on the other hand, support myself, pay for my own books and uniform. so, besides school, i have money to worry about. and yes, i know i sound rude but just give me some other day to apologise alright. i'm too stressed up. and the thing is, i have warned you regarding this entry. having said that, i'll end my entry here. bye ppl.

i miss playing my guitar. so loud that i couldnt hear myself screaming.
i miss just getting lost with the music i make.

2007-03-15T23:20:00.000+08:00

i'm getting such a headache these days. imagine having to wake up as early as 6 and sleeping as late as 11, maybe 12, the previous night bcos u were busy mugging and in which accounts to only 6 hours of sleep? ok maybe 6 hours is enough for some of you but for me, nah.

and econs was such a bore today. the terms and all that, i was like huh? two hours to rush through three months work? crazy. oh well, my writing is turning more and more horrendous and preposterous. someone save me before i turn into a nincompoop.

2007-03-14T23:09:00.000+08:00

hello!

having some free time at the moment, i have decided to try to spend it on blogging.

anyways, i realised that i need to improve the way i blog. as u can see, my blog doesnt talk about/comment/discuss on important stuffs like global issues/world affairs, the world economy or important stuffs like the target of achieving a population of 6.5 million by the Singapore Government. Neither does it talk about/express on ideas on how to bring about change in the world for certain crisis/mishaps/disasters faced in other parts of the world like hurricane Katrina, bird flu, SARS and also most certainly not on things like terrorism. instead, it is just what i feel, a whole lot of often selfish, illogical, sometimes immature, rantings of a teenager who dont appreciate life being displayed on the internet for all to see. in short, it is a catastrophe in writing. a nightmare for readers. so pardon me if i didnt or havent been doing justice to blogging. having said that, i will try my best in lightening the burden that all must bear upon reading this blog. i will improve my language first of all and discuss on things that matter.

if u guys totally believed the whole lot of crap i typed up there, i dont know what to say. haha. of course i'm serious about blogging but as ppl say, blogging can be just about anything and everyone has their own style. mine is simply letting ppl know what i went through in life and my struggles or sth like that. u get what i mean.

haha, ok, so let's see...today, had school as usual, was almost late, got angry for no apparent reason, went for lit lecture and then that's it. lit is kinda scary sometimes but that's precisely why i took it. it scares the shit out of me to think more of what i always think. ppl who take lit are thinkers, in fact they are deep thinkers who has insight and deeper understanding/appreciation of things in life. in fact anyone can do lit. it's just the need to be in touch with your own feelings, emotions and being in touch with ppl. ok, having said that, it's good night. but before that, there's this phrase from a poem that just caught my eye.

I'm a riddle of nine syllables.

haha. the sentence itself is so direct yet indirect. figure that out.

2007-03-13T19:11:00.000+08:00

Going to my blog suddenly feels very awkward.

must be the long absence from it. hmm, anyway, i'm posted to innova jc. wow and,...yay.

ok, so as u can tell, i'm very "excited" about school. so excited that i wore home clothes on what is actually the first day of school but me being foolish, i merely thought it was just a day where we report to the school we were posted to. i was expecting for the day to be filled with tours, decide if we wanna stay, confirm our applications and get our freaking butts home. but no! instead, we were told that school ends at 4, and everyone was like in their secondary school uniform, everyone's hair is neat and tidy and i look like a so-not-jc guy with long hair covering my eyes and my ears wearing a striking red colour oversized pony t-shirt. ok so not surprisingly, almost everyone had either that sort of "of cos it's not just orientation!" or "is this guy posted to jc?" kind of look on their faces when they saw me. ok, having said that, i still thought that things were not so bad. it is my fault anyway for not wearing uniform and i cant blame them for staring at me because of my long silky hair. i mean sometimes even i cant stop admiring myself in the mirror. hahah! but then, there's this lecturer whose fashion taste goes back to the 70s or sth that she told me to tuck in my pony home t-shirt. yes, seriously, so i was like, huh? who tucks in a t-shirt into levis jeans? so, i ignored her and she shouted at me. but i didnt care. i'm not being rude, she was. she's not even my teacher yet and she shouts at me?
ok so bla bla bla...yada yada yada...we had stupid lame talks and childish immature cheers and by ten o' clock, we left school and ate at ljs. wanted to go back to the school but the ppl there seems too goodygoody and boring and lame and childish and what have you that i didnt have the mood to.

ok so second day was a bit better. shall not elaborate. it was only a bit better.

on the third day, i was almost late for school. the gate was going to be closed soon and me wearing ijc uniform,(most of the other 2nd intake students wore sec sch uniform), got scolded about my hair by this lecturer/teacher at the gate who thinks i'm jc2. seriously, i think the lecturers there are kinda rude. so what if u have degrees, honours, masters, p.h.d? i mean at least the discipline masters in secondary school give us chances and they dont really scold us. they will tell us nicely that our hair might be too long and give us warnings first. then we have one week or so to do sth about it. what i mean is so what if u have high education but u dont have a high sense of morality, respect, courtesy for ppl? it doesnt mean being students, we are the only ones who must respect them and that they can shout at us for merely tiny little things, like hair. and it doesnt mean having long hair for guys means that we are irresponible and lack discipline. what does your hair have to do with your moral values?

ok, so enough about arrogant teachers. i mean it's only two years that i must endure them anyway.

today, found out i was posted to 0743A. will have some ex-classmates from dunearn who will be in the same class as me, yet again. haha. oh well, at least i will have friends. hmm, so generally, today i mainly spent my time going for lectures and eating in school for the first time and studying economics in the library alone. yeah, jc is boring but what to do? i just wanna mug hard, get my two years and a-lvls over and done with. 2 years is not long...with busy schedules time will quickly pass. ok so i think enough is being said for today. i need to do my mugging alr. btw, before i go, u are currently reading what might be the last entry from me as i dont know how busy jc life will be. yeah, so bye ppl.

2007-02-14T14:11:00.000+08:00

hey there....it's been eons since i last updated. ok, so i've got a job at pizza hut some time back ( i make the pizzas), i got back my o level results, and i just submitted my jae application form. not that u guys give any shit about it anyway but here it is.

Choice of Courses

Exam Sitting(s): 2006/2005

1 -	25A JURONG JUNIOR COLLEGE (ARTS) (JURONG JUNIOR COLLEGE)	7 -	N78 DIGITAL VISUAL EFFECTS (NGEE ANN POLYTECHNIC)
2 -	37A INNOVA JUNIOR COLLEGE (ARTS) (INNOVA JUNIOR COLLEGE)	8 -	S85 INFORMATION COMMUNICATION TECHNOLOGY (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)
3 -	35A PIONEER JUNIOR COLLEGE (ARTS) (PIONEER JUNIOR COLLEGE)	9 -	S82 BUSINESS INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)
4 -	N67 MASS COMMUNICATION (NGEE ANN POLYTECHNIC)	10 -	S55 TOURISM AND RESORT MANAGEMENT (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)
5 -	S86 MEDIA AND COMMUNICATION (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)	11 -	S50 INTEGRATED EVENTS & PROJECT MANAGEMENT (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)
6 -	S57 DIGITAL MEDIA (SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC)	12 -	N72 TOURISM & RESORT MANAGEMENT (NGEE ANN POLYTECHNIC)

so in case u might be wondering how badly i did for my o lvls, i got15 for my l1r4 and 20 for my l1r5. it's bad, i know. i was expecting somewhat between 13-16 for both my r4 and r5 but oh well, at least i improved from 20 and 27 in prelims and like ppl say, it could have been worse. and, if i deduct two points from my r5 due to of higher malay and 1 point because of cca, i can still go either pjc, jjc or ijc art streams. yeah, so still not that bad....and some of u might ask why i suddenly choose to go jc. ( i know i'm fickle-minded) well, thinking about it, i did really want to go poly at first (and i think it's quite obvious by my wants and also by how i kept mentioning poly in my previous posts)...but now, i just feel that i'm not ready to go into poly. going into poly and taking a course is like committing yourself to a specific area of studying (at least jc covers almost everything). and doubts just keep creeping up into my head...like whether i will choose the wrong course...whether i will get a diploma in the first place...and all that kinda stuffs...because i heard of ppl going into poly and not getting anything in the end because they slack. and yes i know that jc is tough but hey, nothing comes easy in this world. if u go into poly u still have to excel. it doesnt mean that u can just slack off. and the real reason why i choose to go jc is because i love literature. haha...and, i thought if i just went to poly my subject combination of higher malay and literature in o lvls would just go to waste.

ok so enough about that...i'm not really explaining to you guys like where i'm going and stuffs because anyone would care...the reason i'm typing this entry is to sort of reassure myself or sth that jc is better. (because when i blog, i feel like i'm talking to myself)

and let me just say sth...if u guys dont care about me, dont even bother trying to pretend u do care. it's just a general statement but is indirectly meant for some people...yeah..so bye. that's all i wanna talk about. for now at least.

2007-01-16T20:58:00.000+08:00

hey there...i really have nth much to say but the reason i blog today is because i want someone to realise that what he thinks is funny isnt funny at all. and this person i'm talking about is joey. i hope you're reading this joey.

k firstly, if some of u still do not know what is going on here, let me shed some light onto you. not too long ago, this dickhead joey here has been using my name and spamming James blog. here is what he typed.

4 Jan 07, 18:08
idham: okay okay. its me ryan the dota boy so what you think you are so cool well to hell you go. guitar skills are so sucky 5 of my pimples burst while you were playing. got girl big deal ar. play dick arse

21 Dec 06, 00:58
idham: 'we're all in this together. soaring flying theres not a star in heaven that we can't reach. oh oh we're breaking free. BRO FOR LIFE. blood bros

23 Dec 06, 01:13
idham: hello james surprised to see me? hope you get the girl that you told me that you like and love to ****. must video and show me okie?name start with s right? i know okie

well joey firstly, after what u did, i really really think u are a loser. and the thing is u still did not want to admit it when i asked if it was you. i think that's rather dumb cos it's obvious that it was you and also if u had admitted it would have at least been better. and in the first place, why did u spam James blog using my name? dont keep saying that it's all a joke and i'm overreacting and all that shit excuse. and please dont keep talking about how u and me use to disturb zai and all that shit too k? how i disturb zai at school by just mere teasing like how friends tease each other and how u spam James blog using my name are two totally different things. and before spamming James blog, u also spammed mine and i have reminded you countless times not to spam my blog.

21 Dec 06, 00:55
byford: puki mak kau teh teh bersak. jangan step mat rib. aku bantai kau, kau tahu ke tak?arrif kau lagi jangan puki tahu ke tak

u sound like a complete idiot and i really see no purpose in u typing all this crap. so u said that it was all a joke and u're bored during holidays and all of these was just to laugh it out? oh, so u spam my blog and use my name to spam James blog and u think all that is funny? did i ever do these kind of things to you? and u mentioned sth about mat rib? u spelled it wrongly and u sounded so stupid. and i may not be a mat rep but i can still beat the crap out of you if u force me to. and u even mentioned my mom huh? and in case u dont know what i'm refering to (cause it is quite obvious by how idiotic u sounded), it is this quote "puki mak kau teh teh bersak." you are being very disrespectful and what really ticks me off is when u went to spam James blog using my name, fucking faggot. and u talk about fucking the girl that James like and videoing it? u really have no respect for me by using my name and also by talking about fucking the girl that James like, u are a real fucking butthole. u have no consideration for James feelings and also, do you realise that if James was so narrow-minded and impulsive he would have quarrelled with me? so is it all still a joke huh? and the thing that i dont completely understand is the fact that why are u doing all these? have i ever done anything to you huh? and yet when i confronted u on msn u talk about how we have been classmates for 4 years and how we use to do things together and all that shit? if u treat me like a friend or a brother or i dunno what also, u wouldnt have done all those things in the first place. it seems u treat me like an idiot to whom u could make fun of by using his name and disturbing ppl just so as to entertain urself. come on man, get a life will you? and grow up please and be mature. u're 16 for God's sake.

this goes to the rest of the spammers who have spammed my blog before. and joey, if u get beaten up, i'm happy for you cos u deserved it. u just be careful, u never know how many enemies u have made.

2007-01-13T18:41:00.000+08:00

hello world...haha...yes i know i've been gone for quite long. did u guys miss me? hahaha...been doing nth much lately, have been at home most of the time, waiting to be called for work. yeah...beginning to feel quite restless at home alr. i need money real bad and i also need to go out (imagine staying at home for like 2 months++ ?!@#$). and money is stressing me out. firstly, i want to earn money to buy clothes for poly. and i also want to buy a brand new guitar. haha. and think maybe i need to cut my hair or sth? wanted long hair at first but it can be quite irritating at times esp in the early morning and at night. haha. and yes my eyes keeps getting poked by my fringe. i might just turn blind one day. haha.

look at what several days of absence from school and blogging has made my writing into. a catastrophe of illogical ranting.

oh well, think i shall blog no more. at least not for today. haha.

2007-01-12T18:55:00.000+08:00

i dont know what to say.

Happy 365 days my dear. haha.

2007-01-05T23:35:00.000+08:00

i went to school today for the first time this year. haha. now going back to school seems like a trip to memory lane but at the same time, it seems a strange place now that i'm not going to be there anymore. there seems to be this empty feeling, maybe a feeling of separation or sth? i dont know, it's kinda a mixed feeling.

so today was generally just hanging out at school and chatting with my friends as well as seeing some familiar faces in school and some not so familiar ones. then went to fareez's house to just chill and play games. and now i just came back home.

ok, i think that's it then. currently not in the mood to really express how i feel. and yes, i hate ppl hiding under my name. currently there's a loser out there who's been using my name to spam ppl's blog and he thinks it is funny. let's see who gets the last laugh. if u dont stop it, i shall stop u then. i mean it.

2007-01-04T22:38:00.000+08:00

hello ppl...i'm back again. sorry for my absence these few days. my com has a bit of a problem. most of the time it keeps saying on the monitor "no keyboard present". haha. but thinking about it, even if i do update my blog, it's not like u guys are interested to read my BORING AND MUNDANE entries or sth. yeah, cos even i get bored of myself. haha. so firstly, i think today's entry might be a bit long. so i suggest that u guys just scroll all the way down. and if any of u havent noticed, i changed my skin. and it's all being done by someone special. =)

anyways, i also just wanted to say how awkward i've been feeling these days. seeing ppl in school uniform hanging out with their friends after school while i'm trying to find a job. haha. yeah...i kinda miss school. i miss wearing the school uniform, i miss the jokes and the pranks, i miss playing poker cards, i miss going to toilet and passing by classes just to look at that someone (haha), i miss coming to school late, i miss hanging out at the library, i miss just sitting at the canteen looking at other students, i miss soccer, i miss P.E., i miss copying homework during recess, i miss eating in class, i miss school man. haha...and gotta admit i'm not that ready to enter poly/jc or whatever life. and i'm not sure if i will get new friends, looking at the way that i socialise now, it's scary. HAHA. and even zai is more "popular" than me. nyahahaha.

but well, i cant stay in dunearn for eternity or sth. haha, went to singapore polytechnic open house today. ok lah...but there were no media and design exhibition or sth? i dunno, maybe i'm blind or busy looking at the environment. hmm....i'm rather interested in games design and development. yeah. kinda cool to study while playing games...haha...but not sure if there's much of a future and whether i will just play and not study, which is kinda bad. hahaha. oh ya, ate free KFC for the first time in my life today. haha. and these two days have been playing COUNTER-STRIKE. kinda sucky now, havent played for two years? (think so). ok lah...but not the top, always second or third? at least get to kick some 20+ ppl's ass. haha.

ok, talking about poly, i dont have much of clothing. yes yes, i wear the same clothes for two weeks. haha. kidding lah...i need to find work fast before i start schooling again. so far there are two jobs, both packers but not sure if i can get them. plus, i'm waiting for friends. yeah. hope i can avoid wearing the same shirt for two weeks and smelling like zai in poly.

ok, i think that's about it. actually wanted to blog more things but i guess the happy and lame things are better off than the sorrow ones. bye.

2006-12-22T15:27:00.000+08:00

hello. havent been doing anything much lately, just rotting and rotting and ROTTING at home. haha. and i havent been updating my blog cos i keep doing the same things each day, so no point right? i wake up, eat breakfast, watch tv, use computer, take a nap, wake up, eat dinner, watch tv, sleep. BORING. HAHA.

anyways, i thought u guys might like to see this.

seriously, i used to think that music is really a whole lot of crap. remember your primary school days where u have musics lessons and u have to learn stuffs like do re mi and play the recorder? and to make it worse, u still have music lessons in sec 1 and sec 2? and usually the teachers are old and boring losers who have nth better to do than keep asking u to sing songs while they clap their hands and stuffs. hahaha...ok so those were the times. when i was in sec 2 approaching sec 3, i then thought it was a relief not to have music lessons again and that i would nvr have to pick up any instruments again. ok so that was what i thought.

then one day my bro came home with a guitar (i had no idea why up to this day). at first, it was an acoustic, i tried playing it when no one was looking and i thought it was boring. haha. then a few days later, he brought home an electric guitar. ok, then i tried, i asked him to teach me but u know what he will say. haha...like all typical brothers he said no. so i went to the internet, started learning slowly, watched videos, and it got fun. but i have never really understood why musicians still do what they always do. i see drummers banging here and there...and guitarists with long hair and the first thing i thought was a bunch of nth better to do ppl. haha. but now, i guess everything changed. i do realised now why ppl play instruments. like for me, when i play the electric guitar (although i'm not good at it), everything seems to stop, even time and nth else really matters, all that matters is you and the guitar, just that very special moment. it's as if all ur problems disappear and u can express yourself through the instruments, anger, sadness, loneliness. haha, u might say that i'm being too emotional here but it's true...just look at the video i just posted. look at how his face is so full of emotions and passion and it's as if his inner voice is screaming through the guitar. and the best part is, when u perform, and all eyes are on you, and the solo comes, and then u play it, and ppl are cheering for u. so music is not such a bad thing after all. it's just that it's kinda sad the way music is nowadays. everywhere u go and it's punk rock, techno and emo screamo shit. where has iron maiden, metallica and pantera gone to? i'm not trying to be one-sided here, but seriously? it seems that music needs a revolution. a metal revolution.

2006-12-15T15:27:00.000+08:00

The Bottom Line
If things are still not going smoothly for you and someone else, don't give up hope.

In Detail
If things are still not going smoothly for you and someone in your life today, do not give up hope. This is not a sure sign that the end is near -- it's merely a (very aggravating) bump in what is sure to be a long road. To cheer yourself up, keep yourself distracted. Seek out the types of activities you enjoy the most -- sports, cooking or even an engrossing movie could be a perfect way to get you out of your head for a while so you can stop worrying so much.

this is so true. oh well, better get distracted then. hope that it's not the end like what it says.

2006-12-05T14:23:00.000+08:00

just realised that i have not been blogging for quite a while. i think i may have lost the mood to blog? i'm not sure either. i just read my entries and i always realise i sound weird. maybe not just blogging...i think i do always sound weird. haha. yeah okok...i know that i should have realised that earlier but i didnt say that i'm a good blogger and that i'm not a weird person. =P

so let's see...on 29/11, i had my first prom. yeah...it's the first time i put make-up on...haha....my mom asked me to so as to hide my pimples but it didnt really helped anyway. arrived at holiday inn parkview with my friends aiman and zulhafiz, (hafiz's aunt sent us)....met zulhafiz and aiman at zulhafiz's house first and on the way to his house, i had to take lrt and ppl were giving me strange looks cos i was wearing blazer?or maybe cos i look weird. so generally when we arrived, almost everyone looked great...yeah. maybe except for me of course...i looked fantastic! hahaha, just kidding! haha...i dont know how i looked.

so prom was generally okay la...the emcees were lame...and i performed with my band. sweet child of mine and knocking on heavens door by Guns N' Roses. yeah, i know we keep playing these two songs but hey we didnt have time to practise for other songs yet...and we were only told that we could performed last minute. -_- and sorry that i cant put up any prom photos...cos i dont have any...i mean i took very very little photos...no one wanted to take with me except for Pie. haha.

After prom, sent Pie home. haha. then went on to meet my friends and eventually stayed at the hotel(my friend rent a room). we did lots of crazy things...haha...shall not elaborate...too much details. haha. and oh yeah...i just quitted my job recently as a waiter in tambuah mas tanglin...it was too far and tiring... now trying to find jobs. haha... and yest, went VIVO with Pie. she wanted to shop but i dont know if it's counted as shopping. we merely looked around in shops for hours but she only bought a pullover...hahaha....but still, it's amazing how much stamina WOMEN have for shopping...luckily i'm quite used to it...my mom can shop for one whole day just for one pair of shoes... -_- then went on to eat banquet...ate dry fishball noodles which were fucking hot and spicy and i kept having chilli stuck to my teeth. haha...and then we went to look around at candy empire? we thought we wanted to steal some candy but there were cameras...hahaha. yeah and then we had trouble finding our way to the mrt. haha...but we managed to go home in the end.now today, i'm at home...suppose to have class shalet but i have no money lah... =( a bit sad lah yeah but what to do? just try to find jobs then work lorh. haha...ok lah...i've blogged long enough...lunch is waiting for me.

2006-11-25T22:14:00.000+08:00

I went out everyday for this whole week!!! *makes shock face* I went out everyday for this whole week!!! -_- hahahaha. and town is seriously starting to become boring.

let's see...monday, had science paper. then after the paper i went to eat delifrance with Pie. then we went back to school. the jc/pre-u thing was seriously a waste of time lah...haha. then after that went westmall with zulhafiz, aidil, haziq, raji and aiman. then on tuesday, went to find a job with helmi, muz, zai and aidil. haha...but we separated from muz and helmi later on. we all applied for a job as waiter in Tambuah Mas restaurant in Paragon and we got it. just hope i can cope though. starting on monday but i'm at Tanglin Mall alone while the rest are at Paragon. =( haha.oh well, ppl are saying i will make new friends. yeah, let's just hope that happens. oh ya! me and aidil sprayed KAMASUTRA MASSAGE OIL at zai. it says on the bottle that it arouses senses and stimulates...and women were all looking at zai as they walk past...hahaha. it's not so bad what zai. at least women are looking at you(for the first time!) hahaha. kidding lah. after that meet Pie and L at 6 pm. then followed them shopping. =)

hmm..then on wednesday, initially wanted to go dentist but didnt and instead, we went town. me, aidil, abu, justin, qam, james, zai and haziq. then on thursday, followed fareez to town to apply for the same job as me and also look for his prom stuffs and then in the evening went to jp with Pie to look for shoes. but she said all the shoes were not nice.haha

then friday, which was yest, went town with Pie again. she bought topshop necklaces. then we ate burger king and took a train ride home. then today, went imm with whole family to shop for groceries and look for my black shoes (i need those type of businessmen black shoes for work, which i truly dislike) haha. then after that met Pie yet again at jurong east int...went to fetch her and wanted to go back imm, but it was raining...so we had to wait for bus (the free shuttle bus to imm) but people were pushing here and there like their father's place and the first bus was full while the second one took hours to arrive...haha..no lah...actually only 45 mins. hahaha! i'm so funny! *grins* yeah right. anyways, we ended up in wm eating kfc. hahaha...then she wanted to look for presents for her friend, and after that then we went home.

wah so long....haha. so let's see...did i leave anything out? hmm...i dont think so. anyway, prom's coming...i'm gonna look so plain...i dont have accessories like necklace. oh well...and i havent dye my hair also...shit lah. how?how?how? oh well...plain it is then. =( will update soon ppl...kinda tired to really think of what to write.haha.

back.

2006-11-15T18:35:00.000+08:00

hey, it's been quite a while. o's is nearly over...FINALLY! only left with a maths paper2 tmr, then hist the day after and science paper 1 on monday...so far,it was okok only lah...not that easy, not that hard either...hope i can just get an a2 for higher malay, a1 for emaths and literature and at least b3 for combined science....but right now i cant really tell how i did and i dont know the grade that i will most likely get. yeah...so, i still dont know where i'll most probably end up. then after o's, prom is coming. i still have no idea what to wear...dont really feel excited about it...haha. hmm...what else? i just dont really know what to do after o's. haha... initially wanted to work but not sure if i can get the job now. yeah...i'll most likely be at home playing x-box, computer games, guitar, watch tv, watch vcds and dvds, sleep, or just slacking, wanking. haha...just kidding. hmm...i just want one thing after o's....LONG HAIR! haha... i just hope i wont look like a gay ass bastard or sth. yeah. just cant wait for the day that o's are over. i can finally burn my books and slack till i rot to death.

bye.

2006-10-25T18:34:00.000+08:00

bye world.this is the last time u may hear from me. o levels lah...dont so sad leh.

bored.

2006-10-10T12:54:00.000+08:00

hey ppl! i'm bored so i decided to blog....nyahahaha. yeah i know i should be studying but i'm very tired...physically and mentally. it's not that i'm being selfish but my parents keep telling me to do housework (lazy parents)...and my bro keeps going out so he doesnt have to do it. and it's not sometimes...it is everyday. i need to fucking study...the o levels are coming and i keep wasting my time doing lame housework. what if i dont do well later? am i to blame? not trying to make you guys have sympathy with me or anything but just felt like complaining. yeah. i have o levels and cant they at least let me have time to study? they are always saying about how tired they are when i tell them i need to study. wow, am i not tired too? doesnt mean that since i'm younger i'm less tired. then after doing housework i will be too tired to do anything else.yeah... and so far, i have only been studying e maths. who knows i might just fail o lvls.

uncertainty.

2006-10-06T23:29:00.000+08:00

o levels is coming and it's coming fast...well, looking at my prelim results...it seems i might not make it. yeah it's quite demoralizing but i guess i have no choice. Just try to do what i can and give my best then. Hopefully, things will turn out fine in the end. hmm...yeah. had lessons today. ended at 5.30? think so....started at 3...had maths. we went through a maths worksheets. i just realised that given the time and perseverance, a maths is not that hard after all...well, it's still hard but not as hard as before. haha. yeah. hmm...getting a b4 for o level a maths would really be nice.haha. yeah...but i think a pass is ok? haha. cos i never passed before. only once. yeah. -_- go ahead and laugh at me.

anyways, been studying (erm really?) hahaha...very stressed, so i took a break to listen to songs and just to blog i guess. haha. yeah...not going to sleep today. going to study till tmr morning...then gonna sleep tmr afternoon. yeah. haha...studying at night can really be nice you know. haha. hmm...ok, i guess there's nth else alr. yeah. this may just be one of the last times i'm blogging. the next entry might be next year? haha...i dont know. anyways, take care.

here it goes.

2006-10-06T10:35:00.000+08:00

so this is how it goes.

o levels, prom night, work? poly/ art school/ jc (doubt so)/ millenia/ ite?? things are going to start to change...i just hope for the best.

happy children's day.

2006-10-02T20:09:00.000+08:00

today is the last day of school and it feels so mellow but at the same time a little sad. haha...4 years of interesting memories and experiences....i sometimes feel that primary school should be 4 years and secondary school 6 years instead...haha. yeah...besides being able to have more time to prepare for o lvls, to me, secondary school life is really the "period" where one learns a lot of things and grows up from that kiddy bastard to a teenager....haha. yeah...i also wonder why i appreciate my secondary school friends more than my primary school friends...although i know them only for 4 years as compared to some of my primary school buddies. haha...yeah...amazing isnt it?? i guess the secondary school ones are more than just friends....we sorta became buddies and we are always helping each other on the problems we face upon growing up and the stress we face in school. yeah...i guess emotions do play a part. hmm...anyway...yesterday was children's day. i love children's day...hahaha.

HAPPY CHILDREN'S DAY! XD

me.

2006-09-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

hey ppl...no mood to really update. it's just that i really scare myself sometimes (the things i do and the problems which i land myself into)....well...okok fine. a lot of times i guess....i just wonder what it's like to be other ppl at times...seeing that most other ppl are happy with their lives and things go perfectly for them...well, at least almost perfect. i just realise that i will do things that i'll always regret later, and my life is never good. ppl get good results, i get bad results. erm, what else? they lead happy lives...good relations with parents....friends....and no worries for things like money.....oh ya...they sure look better also...and me?! i have lots of flaws. why cant i be like other ppl...happy and joyful? why cant my life be good like them? why? is it too much to ask? or is it my fault? yeah...it's me. gotta change.

it takes some time to let you go and it shows.

2006-09-28T22:55:00.000+08:00

hey ppl....I'm dead for my o levels!!!!!!!!

haha. sorry. lost control...it's just that my prelim results suck ah. i like really focus on my science and english and look at the kind of marks that i get, waste my effort...a lot of little mistakes lead to high loss of precious marks....then what about the subjects that i didnt put in effort like literature and a maths????haha...ppl are getting good marks and i'm still floundering....haha...i will die if this is my o levels grades...yeah. die la....it's very demoralizing and tiring. tmr getting back more papers....wish me luck yeah? u'd better. haha. sorry but i'm just stressed. haha.

sick.

2006-09-23T00:02:00.000+08:00

it's been quite a while eh...my blogger account was having problems...starting to fall sick...can feel my body temperature rising and my nose is starting to get runny...so far prelims was errrr.....ok? i cant decide..haha...some were okay...some were hard...yeah...worried for o lvls and a maths esp...haha. i can still see myself failing the a maths for prelims....hmm....gonna work after o lvls man...i need the money....need to buy a lot of things and u feel accomplished if u get them yourself....and furthermore...my parents wont buy for me. -___- yeah...haha....ok people...i'm feeling dizzy...just took medicine....got to rest. take care yeah?

no time.

2006-09-19T22:11:00.000+08:00

maths and ss today. had no time to finish both papers. didnt do last question of source based questions and didnt complete histogram for maths. so at least 7 marks gone for ss and 3 marks gone for maths(although i know it cant be just 3 for maths). tmr's physics and literature. havent studied yet. yeah. all the best idham! haha. wishing luck to myself.

If you are asked to make an extra effort in a relationship, don't feel suspicious.

my horoscope. i put it here because i find it rather shocking? haha. take care ppl.

chemistry.

2006-09-18T17:14:00.000+08:00

i screw up in chemistry. i think.

1.Full name: muhd idham bin mohd ali
2.Name backwards: dhum mahdi
3.Meaning of name: idham
4.Nick name: idham
5.Screen name: idham
6.D.O.B: 6/7/90
.Place of birth: SGH
8.Nationality: Singaporean
9.Current location: CCK
10.Star sign: Cancer
11.Religion: Islam
12.Height: 1.71m
13.Weight: 52kg
14.Shoe size: 9/10
15.Hair colour:black
16.Eye colour:black
17.Who do you look like: idham
18.Innie or outtie: none
19.Lefty or righty: Righty
20.Gay, Straight, Bi or others: Curve
21.Best Friends: NWO
22.Best Friends you trust most: NWO
23.Favourite Pals: NWO
24.Best friends of opposite sex: confirm not you.
25.Best Buddies: NWO
26.Boyfriend or Girlfriend: dont have
27.Crush: someone
28.Parents: alive
29.Worst enemies: you
30.Favourite online guy: confirm not you
31.Favourite online girl: ....
32.Craziest Friend: confirm not you
33.Advice Friend: me
34.Loudest Friend: confirm not you
35.Person you cry with: me
36.Any sisters: 1
37.Any brothers: 1
38.Any Pets: no
39.Any disease: aids
40.Pager: -
41.Personal Phone Line: 999
42.Phone: 10 cent public phone
43.Lava Lamp: no
44.Pool or Hot tub: none
45.A car: my dad's
46.Your Personality: unpredictable
47.Driving: Not Yet
48.Room: toilet
49.What's missing: confirm not nothing
50.School: Dunearn Secondary School
51.Bed: warm and comfy
52.Relationship with parents: bad
53.Believe in Yourself: no
54.Believe in love at first sight: dont know
55.Good listener: dont know
56.Get along well with parents: no
57.Save e-mail convos: no
58.Pray: sometimes
59.Believe in reincarnation: no
60.Make fun of people: yes
61.Like to talk on the phone: depends
62.Want to get married: yes
63.Like to drive: tricycle
64.Motion sickness: no
65.Eat stem of broccoli: yes
66.Eat chicken with fork: no
67.Dream in colours: yes
68.Type with your fingers on home role: ?
69.Sleep with stuff toys: no
70.Next to you: something
71.On the walls of your room: dust
72.On your mousepad: mouse
73.Dream car: tamiya 4WD
74.Dream date: quite time alone with that someone
75.Dream honeymoon spot: Paris
76.Dream husband or wife: confirm not you
77.Bedtime: anytime
78.Under your bed: another bed, guitars
79.Single most important qns : what?
80.Bad time of the day: everytime
81.Your worst fear: you
82.The weather: cloudy
83.Time: 5.30 pm
84.Date: 18 September 2006
85.Best trick did on someone: nothing
86.Theme song: power rangers
87.Hardest thing on growing up: growing up
88.Funniest experience: now
89.Scariest experience: yesterday
90.Silliest thing you had ever said: i love you
91.Most desperate and funniest thing you have done to get the opposite sex: how i know?
92.Scariest thing while you are with your friends: none
93.Worst feeling: stomach ache
94.Best feeling in the whole: orgasm
6 People i ask to do this are : you, you, you, you ,you ,you.

no school today.

2006-09-14T15:46:00.000+08:00

have been online since morning...and i just remembered everyone else is at school today...except me...i dont have paper...yeah. so i just stared at the screen for an hour. nah...i downloaded songs. tomorrow is literature...and my file and twelve night book is in school...yeah. wanted to go school to take it but was just too lazy. yeah. lazy to do anything these days. even blogging. yeah. so that's all for today.

If you thought I'd leave, then you were wrong
Cause I won't stop holding on.

Cause I've seen love die
Way too many times.

hungry.

2006-09-09T20:11:00.000+08:00

why does it take so long for my pizza to arrive? haha...mom ordered pizza....and i'm sitting here waiting for it to arrive...actually mom alr cooked but i dont like her cooking today..hahaha...yeah...so i'm sitting here in front of the computer cursing and waiting for the stupid pizza man. haha...so bored at home today...so i studied, but only managed two chapters of physics...yeah...but still, better than the past few days where i've been slacking, still left 6 more chapters of physics and then i'm gonna start my chemistry. yeah...one side of me wants to study and do well while another side wants to go out/play guitar/watch tv/sleep/listen songs/slack. hahaha. if only i can separate myself into two and do two things at the same time. haha...cool. yeah...gonna stay up late today...want to finish my physics...yeah...i have to. got to pretend o lvls is tmr. it works sometimes...haha...not all the time though as one side of me will be in denial and knows that tmr is not o lvls. i cant even lie to myself. haha...i've spent about 10 mins typing this and in total, it's been half an hour waiting for this pizza man. hope he dies. hahaha. kidding. oh here he is. he's at the door now. bye. got to eat my pizza.

10 mins. only.

2006-09-08T17:30:00.000+08:00

i realise that i can only focus on studying for 10 mins. next week is alr prelims...and still, i get so distracted easily...hahaha. had mock prac on wed...it was so-so.... i didnt know the titration thing but nvm, it's only mock prac. haha. went library yest. and on the way...saw a lot of ppl i knew. and in the library, saw some more ppl that i know of. yeah. and i didnt study...and i distracted someone else also...played tic-tac-toe? haha...sorry eh? left the library at 8? yeah...ate ban mian...hahaha....ppl say i eat like a girl. -_- haha...and never ever take 188 at night. just dont k. reached home at 11.... yeah...super tired...and then slept for 10 hours....now nth to do...so update my blog. yeah...k that's all. i gotta study. haha.

thanks. =)

back.

2006-09-05T19:41:00.000+08:00

it's been quite a while since i posted. well, went to school today...had literature tutorial....and then went to eat at the coffeeshop near the school with aiman and qam....yeah, then it rained.....walked the long way back to school as i left my bag in art room....then just sat around in the art room watching khaty and qam do their art work until 3...and then at 3, went back home and took a nap. nowadays have been really affected by lots of stuffs....yeah....sorry.

it's like a love song.

knocking on heaven's door

2006-08-31T22:19:00.000+08:00

hmm...teachers day today....i dont know how i did...i could hardly hear myself....haha....and different ppl were giving different comments....yeah...anyways....from today until next year...i cant play anymore guitar....have to send my current one for some repairing and modifications which will take some time....maybe buying another guitar also. this time, maybe white.

so, now what?

letting go.

2006-08-28T23:24:00.000+08:00

have been doing quite a lot of thinking recently....yeah....cant seem to be able to let go of quite a lot of things recently....yeah....and it's been making me feel so fucked up these days...yeah....what i'm saying here is letting go as in giving in to something and also letting go as in just letting go of sth. why must i let go? why? and i dont like the feeling of losing something....especially when it's sth you have been wanting or having for quite a while...it just makes me feel helpless, lost and lonely. yeah. help me please. actually no, dont help me. it's not just losing sth simple. But i think i have no other choice left. i'll just have to let go and watch what happens.

tangled up.

2006-08-27T19:16:00.000+08:00

hmm...today i dont really know what to post...not because i have no idea what to type but more of there are too many things to type about...some of which is a little personal...yeah. been stressing out lately...by mock exams and stuffs...teacher's day is coming....have to perform, yeah....then prelims are also coming...then o lvls...and then prom night in which i shall make a mockery out of myself....yeah....things just have to happen one after another...and i sometimes dont know what i should be doing...yes i know i must be studying but i just dont know why i dont have the motivation to do so and feels like there's things like my own personal problems to settle with first. and there are just too many to settle with. yeah and tmr is a maths mock exam...the subject i hate most....but why the hell did i take it in the first place i also dont know why and teachers keep saying that it's an advantage compared to those not taking it. wth. okok...i think i better stop complaining. gonna mug either now or later for the first time.
oh ya...and today is my sister's birthday and all i'm doing is complaining about my own life and not give her anything... yeah. good huh?

waited.

2006-08-22T22:37:00.000+08:00

hmm...there is seriously a lot of things that i want to type out here....but there are just some things that are holding me back....yeah...generally i've come to realise that over time ppl change....looks change....feelings change...situation change....thinkings change....and that's what scares the shit out of me. haha...i just rmbred how i used to be quite irritating (not that i am not irritating now) at sec 3 by always disturbing ppl and i suddenly realised that i have not been really doing it recently...i just tease my friends nowadays....it used to be everyone, even ppl i dont know where i will throw things at them and stuffs....yeah...and so have situations....i'm quite apprehensive about my future....about my o lvls...and about uncertain situations that i'm faced with now and the unpredictabilities of events which may occur due to normal situations leading to other more complicated situations of which i shall not mention about. yeah...so what shall i do now? should i just sit by and watch and just wait for the future to take place or should i make a move and change things? the thing is...i dont know what the future is and i'm afraid i cant accept it and come to terms with it....ppl always tell me to just hang in there and accept what happens but i dont want my future to be filled with regrets....but maybe it's true...all i can do now is wait. and wait.

unprepared-ness.

2006-08-21T20:11:00.000+08:00

haha...NO! prelims are coming....and so is TEACHER's day...haha...and so is O LVLS!!!! haha...sorry....just stressed out here a lil...time flies so fast....haha...i'm not prepared...i still wanna slack for at least one more year? haha....yup...not in the serious mood yet....and still, i'm doing nth about it....haha...die...lucky today's higher malay prelims paper 1 was okok....haha...not too easy, not too difficult...haha....yup. hmm....i need a study buddy....who?who?who?haha...i want someone who i can study with but can crap at the same time but also cannot crap too much...generally, i want someone who's fun to study with but at the same time someone who can focus and be serious.haha....erm....maybe i can study on my own then crap on my own then scold my ownself to focus after crapping...hahaha....ok ppl....i gtg alr...udpate again tmr...haha....sorry for the crap content.

Bleeding.

2006-08-20T14:58:00.000+08:00

All the things that I used to say
All the words that got in the way
All the things that I used to know
Have gone out the window
All the things that she used to bring
All the songs she used to sing
All the favorite TV shows
Have gone out the window

wish me luck for higher malay prelims tomorrow. fuck i havent study...no mood. haha...sorry for the very short entry...didnt know what to type. nth really happened today anyway just that my sole of my left foot bled like hell. the skin just tore open. dont ask me why...i'm puzzled by it myself. haha. k bye.

normal friday.

2006-08-18T20:54:00.000+08:00

haha...today is very mundane and normal....yeah....did physics practical....quite fun...haha....we kept disturbing each other....yeah then had eng and then maths. then school ended....played poker cards, went for ss mock test....and then soccer...yeah...like usual....nowadays, things are very boring for me...yeah. haha...i seriously dont know what else to type to be honest...hahaha....fuck, my entries are boring cos i'm boring...hahaha.

The Bottom Line
Ideas around and about duration will be dominating your mind today -- plan ahead.
In Detail
Ideas around and about duration will be dominating your mind today -- you're thinking more and more about making things last. In terms of your romantic life, you may be finally ready to make the type of commitment you've always been intimidated by before. On the job, you might want to put more of yourself into what you do every day -- and identify whose job you want to be promoted into in a year. Your ambition is starting to wake up, and you're starting to think more about enduring.

haha...my horoscope for yesterday...i never really understood horoscopes anyway...but sometimes it can be quite scary when it knows how your day have been...haha.

here's the one for today.

The Bottom Line
Spoil yourself -- a nice dinner, spa day or new pair of shoes might do the trick.
In Detail
Someone close to you is moving more into their own external world right now, so don't take it personally if they cancel some together time you two had planned. Give them space to figure out whatever it is they're trying to figure out. Part of being a good friend or partner is knowing when to step back and provide space. In the meantime, take advantage of a hole in your calendar to spoil yourself -- a nice dinner, spa day or new pair of shoes might do the trick.

haha....new pair of shoes eh? haha...yeah, i guess so...haha...ok that's all for today ppl....i know my entries are boring but who ask you all to read?hahahahaha...

oral

2006-08-17T21:21:00.000+08:00

hahah....had oral today....luckily it's over alr.....yup...quite easy.....haha....but my chemistry mock test was shit....i didnt know how to answer a lot of questions...yeah...gonna fail it like fuck....hahaha...i had thoughts of just giving up and sleeping through the test but sleeping is more boring anyway....haha....have not smoked for two days....yeah...had temptations but my friends helped me....haha....yeah....today is very boring...after mock test went home...yeah....but no choice....haha...then had dinner and watched singapore idol....mathilda got voted out....haha....but to me, it's not a big deal to get voted out of singapore idol....haha...yeah......going to have higher malay prelims on mondya...better start studying alr...haha.....yeah....ok gonna ciao. nth to talk about alr.

weird wednesday

2006-08-16T21:53:00.000+08:00

haha...felt strange today.....had a rollercoaster ride of emotions today....was quite pissed during pe....yeah....then after school got more pissed.....felt tired and stressed...wanted to *****. but luckily i didnt...haha...i have detention at 5 but i have to go for higher malay as it's the last lesson and also because i have not studied for the ss mock test....so if i go for higher malay i will not have to take the test today....but the thing is higher malay ends at 4.30 and i had no mood to go back to school from cck....plus my house is very near bukit panjang govt high. can just walk home. yeah so it's lame to go back to school just for detention. haha. it's like from bukit batok go cck then go back batok then cck again to go home....haha. yeah...haha....but i still went back school...dont know why....then it turns out no one was in school anymore , my friends i mean -_- happen to met james at bus stop, talked a while and then went home....haha. at home i felt strange....my mood got better....watched singapore idol....Jasmine sang SWEET child of mine...haha....strangely i didnt recognise the song at first....then suddenly it sounded familiar.....the lyrics and the guitar....haha. yup....i thought the guy was gonna play the solo.....then it was -___________- haha....oh nvm. jonathan's not bad also....haha...generally not much comments for singapore idol except the fact that i dont like joakim....haha.....he can't sing. haha...sorry to all his fans out there. it's a singing competition...dont keep him in because of his looks....Rahimah could have stayed and performed tonight....what a waste. haha...just saying....i'm not affected by Singapore idol anyway....o lvls coming babe....wtf...prelims...mock exams...die man....haha.....gotta pick myself up alr....gonna commit myself to some serious studying but i dont know when...hahaha......k maybe now then. bye. haha.

slack

2006-08-10T21:31:00.000+08:00

today damn slack...went denzel's house...play x box and watch tv...then went ***** fest with him...haha...then went home...no mood to study...still quite high...haha...had a lot of sticks today....yeah...i know it's dissapointing to some ppl...sorry yeah. haha. erm k...i read my horoscope again today....aiyah....nth to do with computer nowadays....the ppl whom i want to chat with sometimes are not online or simply too busy....yeah...anyway, here's my horoscope...haha.

The Bottom Line
Step back and let someone else take over -- let them call the shots as they see it.
In Detail
This back-and-forth between you and another person shows no sign of slowing down ... it's becoming part of the relationship dynamic. So today, if you need a break from this showdown, take it. Step back and let them take over -- let them call the shots as they see it. Chances are, without you there to balance their energy and ideas, they won't have very much fun. Being in the background will get your point across far more effectively than confrontation can.

haha. k, i think i know what it means....i'm just gonna let "them" decide what they want to do. dont ask me about this entry. k...bye...tmr there's school...why dont they just make it a holiday...so lame to go school for one day only. haha...lazy sia. haha...k, gonna slack now.

happy national day

2006-08-10T00:04:00.000+08:00

haha...ndp was not bad...nice fireworks. hmm...my horoscope today...quite true. after what happened this few days.

The Bottom Line
If you're not getting all the respect you think you deserve, ask for it today.
In Detail
If you're wondering why you're not getting all the respect you think you deserve, stop to ask yourself if you're you asking for it. Sometimes you have to make a big noise about your accomplishments just so other people can notice -- and be able to make an even bigger noise. So today, climb up on a rooftop and shout out to the world about your latest accomplishment (or just send a tactfully worded email, whichever seems more practical). Start tooting your own horn!

yeah. k. that's it. update tmr i guess.

ndp.

2006-08-08T15:05:00.000+08:00

hmm... today ndp was quite okay. the performances were interesting. yeah. good effort lah by the ppl who performed. we played poker cards while watching the performances....then got ice-cream...i felt sick eating ice-cream...been eating ice-cream at home everyday. yeah then i also ***** a lot today...dont know why....just stressed at home and in school sometimes. yeah. now just using the computer at home.... very bored. yeah. hmm.. think i'm gonna sleep or sth. update again later. no mood.

In a darkened room
Lies the wounded, the shattered
remains of love betrayed.

Tell me when the kiss
of love
Becomes a lie
That bears the scar of sin
too deep
To hide behind, this fear
of running
Onto you
Please let there be light
In a darkened room.

emo huh? bleah. it's lyrics lah. wtf. haha.

random

2006-08-07T21:55:00.000+08:00

hmmm... just gonna type some random stuffs today. tmr is national day celebrations... hope it'll be fun. but i got a feeling it's gonna be boring. heh. esp after school. ppl are either going to just go home or play the teacher students game and i'll just sit there and watch. yeah fuck... but it doesnt mean i'm saying i want to play... just saying that it might be boring as usual. yeah and i hate it when i'm so bored. will do things to entertain myself which are things that might not be so healthy. like s******. yeah. but i dont just do it when i'm bored... when i've been feeling so stressed and had a long day, it's just there for me to "relieve" myself. of all my troubles, worries and tiredness. yeah and dont ask me what it is. those who know good for you. those who dont, too bad. haha... yeah and i've been thinking quite a bit these days also.... gonna sound emo but i realise i have a lot of bad points...i'm a waste of ppl's time and i'm also wasting my own time and besides that, i can be quite a burden...i need to buck up man....but lazy arh...i jsut want to slack....haha. fuck lah, what's wrong with me?

horoscope again

2006-08-06T13:19:00.000+08:00

haha. today i looked at my horoscope again and this is what it says. i just find it weird.

The Bottom Line
Today you'll see how you have helped changed someone's life for the better.
In Detail
You may not have realized it, but you have gone a long way toward changing someone's life for the better. Your influence has taught them how to be more confident and proud of the life they've chosen for themselves. Today you'll finally understand the totality of your influence, but don't take this realization as an impetus to do more. Right now, your work is done. You've accomplished what is possible for this round. If they want you to step in with some advice, they will ask you.

haha. i dont remember helping to change someone's life for the better. haha. seriously. dont ask me why i'm looking at horoscopes. just bored. heh. now alone at home. parents gone out with my sis to westmall. i dont want to follow, no mood to go out with them. They've been quite unreasonable these days... keep asking me to teach sis and do housework, then after that ask me to study. fuck arh. cant even rest. and they always ask me do housework when i'm doing hw. then they say i inconsiderate. never help in the household. wtf. then i wake up at 10 o clock also kena scold. weekends what. stupid arh. haha. dont care them alr ah. now that they've gone out, it's quite peaceful. yeah. i dont know why they've been so unreasonable these days(not like they've ever been reasonable). haha. whatever it is i dont care. i just do the things they ask me to do and pretend to be happy about it. heh, no point arguing with them anyway. waste of my time.

horoscope?

2006-08-05T23:03:00.000+08:00

ok so, 3 posts today. im just damn bored. cant touch my hp. fuck, feel so bored and empty. haha. ok just wanna post sth random. here's my horoscope today at friendster.

The Bottom Line
A friendship could grow into a bigger, much more important relationship today.
In Detail
An informal friendship could grow into a bigger, much more important relationship today; they could become a person who influences your life in either a romantic or a business sense. To make sure you know who you're dealing with, pay attention to the details around them. Ask the type of probing questions that will reveal what they really think of the current situation -- and how they might like it to change. Make sure you're the one pushing things forward, not them.

haha. i dont really quite understand what it is trying to say. haha...but anyway, it just got me thinking. is life alr being decided by fate? or is there still such things such as chance and destiny? haha. i think it's a bit of both. dont even know why i'm talking about this but i just wonder what my future will be like. hahaha. hope i'm not a failure. haha... but seeing the way things are going, i think i might be. hmm...i cant think about that right now, got other things to worry about like, NO HP! haha. can die of boredom. i use my hp not only to sms but also listen to music and play games and use internet and take quizzes. fuck arh, now damn boring. haha. i think i'll find a way of entertaining myself. wth. haha.

handphone part 2

2006-08-05T14:23:00.000+08:00

i realised some things about my dad, not trying to be mean but i just realised how dumb he is. my dad said that smsing other ppl using starhub or singtel costs more and he keeps denying when i told him it's 5 cents no matter what. then i told him to use the calculator and count. then he was paiseyh. 1-0 to me. then he said that if ppl sms me, i will have to pay 5 cents. that means he's saying that for evey incoming sms must pay 5 cents. where got such thing one as incoming sms. wtf, dumb sia he. then i ask my brother. my dad paiseyh again. 2-0. then he said i keep using bluetooth, said it's very expensive. wtf. it's free lorh. i asked my bro again. my dad paiseyh again. 3-0. then he said that i nvr learn my mistake, said i keep denying whatever he said bla bla bla. please lorh, paiseyh alr then say i keep denying and say i nvr learn my mistake. it's the truth what. then he only believes my brother. wtf. haha. dont care him arh, stupid fuck. there's still more moments of paiseyhness from my dad but i cant recall now. hahaha. i shall repost again if i do rmbr. ok, gotta eat lunch. hungry.

handphone

2006-08-05T00:01:00.000+08:00

my handphone got confiscated, by my mom. wheeee. haha. suck arh, my bills high then confiscate. then they tell me to study, force me i mean. now i will be watched when studying. how lame is that. i'm not a child lah. fuck arh. oh well, o lvls coming anyway. no mood to blog. continue tmr.

tired

2006-08-01T20:15:00.000+08:00

had maths till 7 today. i'm tired. i'm just so sick of it sometimes.

anyway, here's sth we learnt in literature.

Love can easily be corrupted by a false appreciation for the experience, especially as that corruption manifests itself in sentimentality and posing, a tendency not to confront the experience directly and honestly but to wrap oneself up in the conventional language of love and to adopt the conventional poses of the distraught lover. There are many dangers of falling in love or with the conventions of love rather than looking directly at or listening clearly to the object of one's love. Such tendencies are dangerous because they cloud people's perceptions and their feelings making them unintelligently sentimental and therefore dishonest to themselves and others.

hmm...so what they are saying here is that love is a complicated matter...it's not just a feeling or emotion...it's more of a need for every human beings. eveyone wants to feel love or be loved in one way or another as it's a nice feeling to have. therefore human beings are always often being disillusioned when it comes to love. Being disillusioned here means being trapped and engulfed in their own emotional feelings and stuffs. Being trapped in their own internal sufferings. Human beings are sensitive when it comes to topics like love and we often get drifted away from reality. Love is such a wonderful feeling to have or delve with that sometimes we think we are in love with a person when all we are is actually is just being in love or loving the idea of love. Sometimes we get too carried away with love that we often think that we suffer from it and become the so called "distraught" lover. But in actual fact, we are just loving the idea of being and love and we are just loving the feeling it gives to us, the pain, the agony, and the joy. That's just how complicated love is.

honours day

2006-07-31T22:15:00.000+08:00

honours day today...went up the stage....yeah they showed my sec 3 photo -_- then had lessons as usual...literature was the most interesting. learnt alot.then had no tutorials today. super boring. played soccer. left halfway...didnt have the mood to play suddenly. accompanied denzel to bukit timah. then ate dinner at al-ameen...then went home. nowadays, it's been very mundane. no mood to study and stuffs...prelims coming...o lvls also! die. i'm a failure and i'm still not motivated to study. Fuck.

are you Mr good-looking?

2006-07-30T11:46:00.000+08:00

today, to be honest, i dont really know what to post....hahaha. but i just read james blog and it got me thinking a bit.... are ppl really being "judged" by how they look? i mean like i've seen good-looking guys leading happy lives like what james said...i see them outside with their branded clothings and nice hairstyles and holding their pretty girlfriend's hand and not having any worries in this fucked up world. and if they break with their girlfriends, any other pretty girl would just come along to comfort them and she's theirs. yeah, so simple huh? and i'm beginning to really wonder what it's like to be good-looking...flawless skin complexion, brown eyes, nice toned body? and seriously, i noticed that good-looking ppl are more popular and has more friends. wtf.

Saturdays

2006-07-29T15:37:00.000+08:00

yay my blog is much better now! all thanks to april...hahaha...thanks k? i'll repay you someday. you even missed your show! haha. didn't think u were that nice loh, sure got motive one....hahaha, kidding. right now just stoning around at home. parents and bro went out. i'm with my little sister. she's playing the computer in my room and i'm using the one in hers to blog. the one in her room is much faster. haha. shhhh...she doesnt know. fallin sick again. had stomach fever a few days back then now i'm having normal fever. -_- my immune system is weak man. i think i'd better start taking care of my health now. i have to eat more especially fruits and cut down on smoking. if not i will keep falling sick and my studies will get affected. yeah. been sneezing countless times and having a bad headache. hahahaha. sorry arh have no idea what to write alr arh. think i better go. haha. and once again, thanks april.

boring friday

2006-07-28T23:43:00.000+08:00

today i went to school fearing that i would get into trouble. haha. firstly, i didnt do my physics hw at all and i didnt went to meet mr raja yesterday. he had a meeting and i didnt wait for him to finish. i just went home. haha. but then i managed to copy the physics worksheets and nick lee didnt even went through them. hahaha. then when i went to see mr raja, he didnt even scold. yeah...haha. so everything turned out fine. and joey got scolded by mr raja during maths lesson. haha. then school ended. did nothing after school. sat with denzel. then james came. then played some poker cards. yeah, then all my malay friends returned from mosque. played some more cards and then played soccer. haha. we challenged to see who could get the ball to hit the crossbar the most number of times. we were too bored. then we went home. BORING! haha, at home also boring sia. now typing this with my electric guitar on my lap. hmm...my life is really getting more and more mundane. not like there's ever been much excitement anyway but it's getting worse and worse. haha. oh well...i think the best is sleep. NIGHT!

back to school

2006-07-27T21:02:00.000+08:00

hmm...today was quite unusual...was late in the morning. just because my hair wasnt styled yet. haha. it was still quite wet at 6.45, couldnt apply wax. -_- i think it's because my hair is getting long and thick. need to cut? no free time..how? i want to keep my hair! but i cant. school rules. furthermore, i dont want ang touching me again. -_- yeah yeah he touched me. wtf. but that was when school just reopened. haha. he touched me and said that my hair was long and that he will shave me botak like him if i didnt cut my hair. haha like real. but still i'd better not risk anything. haha. ok, so had lessons as usual. i realised i not only miss class phototaking but also had a lot of work and tests to take. and ppl were asking me why i didnt come :) haha. and i still havent touched my lit from monday. i owe miss gordon lots of assignments and i'm supposed to hand them up today. aiyah, she'll understand. haha. so after school, had tutorials as usual. then when tutorials ended i suddenly had urge to shit. -_- hahaha. so i went to shit. and then my friends were gone. so i went to find them and i found them playing floorball with the taf club ppl. -_- haha. but i just joined in. it's fun! haha. especially when all your good friends are on the same team as you. yeah, after that i went for latecoming detention class (i was late for 3 times). it was outside the dm room. me, amanda and fareez then sat and talked about some stuffs, and we were talking too loud without realising it. i mean some ppl heard. yeah...very paiseyh. haha. then amanda accompanied me to meet MR CUM. (qam) and we went home. now i'm just slacking around. dont have the mood to do hw. hahaha. think i better start on it.

photo-taking

2006-07-26T14:30:00.000+08:00

i miss photo taking...am at home right now...i had a terrible headache in the morning but i feel much better now. shit man, why did i have to have that stupid headache???? (dont understand? haha. read again.) in other words, why did i have that stupid headache? haha, it's just that ppl might forget me later on as i will not be in the class picture but it's normal i guess...i had quite a lot of memories from dunearn...haha... of coz some bad, some good la...like forging of mc and being champions of d gig....haha. now i'm just staring at the computer looking for templates, yup, damn boring. maybe going school later or sth to meet my friends? i dont know. haha. it's a little stupid but i'm just plain bored. k, i dont know what else to say. i think i'm probably gonna play guitar or sth. bye ppl!

absent from school

2006-07-25T20:15:00.000+08:00

didnt come school today...went doctor....said i have stomach fever. so he said that someone with fever could have sneezed or coughed at my food and then i ate it so my stomach got infected....yeah...whoever u are, be GUILTY! muahahaha...ok lame.yeah...got two days mc...not sure if i want to go school tmr...erm, photo-taking? i know it's the last year but i will only spoil the photos....plus the doctor must have had a good reason to give me two days mc....yeah...nth more to post...haha. bye ppl! gotta watch maggi and me.

SICK

2006-07-24T20:54:00.000+08:00

-_- yeah yeah i got a blog...laugh all u want. today is very boring as usual just that i puked 20 times for i dont know what reason? yeah and i even went to the toilet to puke once during the maths mock test, and i couldnt focus while i was doing the paper. shit, i'm gonna fail! i was busy trying to figure out how to do the questions and i was also busy trying to prevent myself from puking. sometimes i even had to swallow my vomit when i felt it going up my throat. yeah fucking gross. dont u dare ask me what it feels like. haha. i also kept moving about in my seat and got my friends distracted and vijay was giving me this look. haha. yeah so generally, i was not only being disgusting but i was also being a nuisance. then after the maths test, i decided to hang around in school first cause i didnt have the strength to go home. aiman suggested that we go and buy vitagen because he feels that my stomach is full of bacteria? haha. but just after taking a few steps, i vomited yet again. i vomited somewhere outside the npcc room and ppl were giving me strange looks. yeah but what do i care? so i rested a while...then aiman send his gf home. then fadhli was the one who bought for me the vitagen. i drank it and waited for my dad for 50 mins? i'm not trying to complain but he should have come earlier...yeah and at the carpark, i vomited again. so here i am now, i feel a little better but still weird. ok that's all for today i guess.i gotta rest. BYE! oh ya, before i forget, sorry james for having the same template as u...i'll change it later on.